A writing goal is a direction, not a destination

New Year’s Resolutions Quitters Day was January 9.

And I got past that hump because I never make resolutions on Jan. 1. I make them mid-January. 

And anyone who has a birthday to celebrate, or a kid’s birthday to celebrate, knows that it is pointless to make a resolution for how you are going to live you life after the holidays when the holidays are still going on. 

We take the tree down on the 6th and we have two birthdays on the calendar in January.  And I’m always starting a new semester of teaching at this time. Nothing has “settled down”. I can’t even conceive of a “dry” anything. And most of my goals fall apart immediately. Hence why there is a quitters day before I even get started.

And that’s good. This is another instance where my weirdness works out for me. 

One of those goals I have set up for myself has to do with my writing schedule. 

I am a full-time lecturer on writing, which means I have an intense day job where 18-25 year olds submit their writing to me and I give them feedback. And it’s not quite that simple, because 18-25 year olds need advice and adults in their life willing to help, and they are more likely to ask me because I learn their name and meet with them individually. So when they cry in my office because they are overwhelmed, I hand them a tissue and let them tell me why they are crying. This doesn’t always put me in the mindset to write … well ... anything. 

But Spring is different. I have one less class to teach. This makes a world of difference. That means I have one bonus hour two days a week. Surely, I can have more time to write.

Well, that’s only if I let myself. 

If you are thinking that this is the year that you are going to write your novel, that’s fantastic. You are in good company. And there might be a desire, drive, or delusion to make grueling and rigid writing goals for yourself. 

I often make writing goals and often those goals fall short. Because I am unrealistic about how much time I actually have, how much time things take, and how much energy I have to accomplish those goals. 

A few weeks ago, I received an email from the team who represents inspirational business writer Denise Duffield Thomas – an Australian self-help author whose books I have read and advice I have applied. In the email, it read, “A goal is merely a direction” and I latched onto it like a tick on an ankle. We often think of the goal as the destination, but it’s not. It’s a map. It’s an arrow. It’s an intention. 

The system that I am completely cribbing from DDT about my goals is the one she suggests for manifesting your big dreams. The system is not magic or even spiritual. It’s just about focus.

Her steps are:

1. Declutter

2. Get clear and focused about what you want to accomplish

3. Take Inspired Action

4. Accept and Refine

My intention is to write my new novel this year. Which means my direction is toward the computer, toward the writing routine, toward activities that support writing more often. 

Personally, before I even start any major writing project, I have to do the mind-work. I have to give myself the grace to write this novel. And while, yes, I am a professional writer – which means I have been paid for my writing, have already completed two novels and multiple other short pieces – when I start a new piece, I have to repeat a lot of the mental work that comes with the beginning of any new long project.

1. “The idea is good.” This is what I have to tell myself when I get started to keep myself from thinking everything I create is garbage. It’s not. The idea is good and the novel will be good, too. And even if it’s not good, it will at least be fun.

2. “I have permission to write.” Also, sounds dumb. Why would anyone who loves to do something need to give themselves permission to do it? Because I am a human who struggles with all the same mental nonsense as other people – who lives in a world of obligations, distractions, and saboteurs. I can sit here and write for an hour instead of crafting healthy and beautiful box lunches for my children. The laundry isn’t going anywhere, DoorDash exists, and putting my phone on Do Not Disturb is a thing.

3. “The critic goes in the box.” The quickest killer of any new project is the naysayer who likes to pick apart all of your writing choices by reminding you of any horrific criticism you have received in the past. There is no room for critics at the creation table. After a horrible workshop experience where I allowed my critic to live rent free in my brain for many months, I had to do something to evict him. I always imagined him to be a bully, so I purchase a bull figurine. He sits on my bookshelf unless I start hearing all that old mean criticism coming back. When that happens, I take him off my shelf and put him in a shoebox. It helps.  

4. “It’s going to be so much fun!” Because it is fun for me. I love sitting in coffee shops wearing my headphones and sketching out a scene. I love closing the studio door and hammering out a story. I love being in a writer’s flow state where I forget where I am for a while. As I told a writing student last week, “If you think the escapism of reading is addictive, wait until you start crafting your own worlds to get lost in. There is nothing like it!”

After that, I declutter my habits. 

Not super drastic changes, but little ones that will encourage writing. 

• Every few months, I will realize that I have been binging podcasts more than I have been listening to audio books. And while often these podcasts I listen to offer amazing information that I categorize as research, eventually it becomes junk food and I feel gross about it. I need to make the switch. And when I need to make the switch, I need to remember to listen to works of fiction instead of self help or business books – my other go to. Instead, I make self-help books my digital reading – the reading that happens in doctors office’s or waiting for kids to be done with their rehersal, practice, tutoring, or Target trip. Audiobooks are for commuting to campus. Physical books when I am at home.

• Less background TV. I love TV, but sometimes it just provides an opportunity to coach rot. Even searching through Netflix for something to put on takes 15-20 minutes. I frequently lock up my HBO Max app because I will browse for too long. I have the Calm app and I put on nature soundscapes. “Green Noise River” is my go to soundscape.

• Writers playlist. I have a playlist for all my novels. I listen to it in order to inspire the story I am writing. The most recent one has a lot of mournful love songs, alternative artists from the 90s, and classic country. 

• Choosing books over games. I love games. Anyone who gets my newsletter has seen me recommend a variety of cozy games for relaxing. But that’s just time going away from the books. I realized that I should be a writer when I was in my 20s and spent my hours not working and not with my new husband playing Sims. Games are great, but they are a distraction from writing. I’m choosing to put them on pause right now.

Next, I need to get clear about what I want. 

I don’t just want to write a book. I want to experience the process of writing a book. I want to get lost in a flow state. I want to be self-satisfied when I come up with a solution to a problem I made for myself. I want to know what I am working on everyday. I want to have fictional people say things that I would never have the courage to say or do things I would never have the courage to do. Focusing on the book at the end is like focusing on the medal you get at the end of the race. The medal is not the point. The race is the point.

Now, is this potentially dangerous? Can’t someone focus on the process and being lost in the book for so long they never finish it, spinning their wheels for the rest of their lives, never actually completing the book, but always working on it as a distraction from life? Yes. Absolutely. This is why I always give myself a deadline. My deadline for this first draft is August 1.

Once I have declutter, I have to make actions that set myself up for success. 

• Keep my tools close – In my newsletter, I was just lamenting about the need of a sturdy bag, but that’s because I can’t always work at home and I need to carry my things with me. Craftsmen have tool belts and boxes. I have a bag. I used to carry an iPad with a keyboard everywhere, and now I just keep my laptop with me. When it is time to purchase a new laptop, because sometimes laptops get worn out, I always pick something small and lightweight. I can go into any cafe or restaurant with Wifi and devote myself to an hour of writing time while enjoying a cup of coffee. Writing on the road can sometimes be better because I am not distracted by Netflix, my family, or the pull of a kitchen or bathroom that needs to be clean because the health department steps in. Sometimes I work with a legal pad or a writers notebook. But portability is key.

• Make a date with myself – Last Spring I booked a room on campus and invited my writing students to join me for a Write In. This meant that on my calendar, I had to appear in a quiet classroom in the event that a student might take me up on my offer. This was an hour of dedicated, quiet writing time. It was an obligation I set up for myself that catered to my codependent conditioning (I can’t blow this off. A person might be waiting for me!).

• Build a writing community – This semester, I have started a writers group for students who do not regularly take my classes as a way to keep the writing fires going.

• Ring the bell  – I was listening to a group of writers speak about how at the end of a productive writing day, it’s good to honor that accomplishment. One stated that they had a friend who hung a bell outside their writing space, and at the end of a productive writing day, they would walk out and ring the bell. I love this idea, but my husband nixed the bell. At the end of a good writing day, I mark it on my calendar, with a shiny silver star. They’re the kind that teachers and VBS teacher use to reward good behavior. My calendar looks so pretty with all my accomplishments.

Refine the system when it’s not working

I have to stay flexible, because the best laid plans can fall apart all the time. Kids get sick, responsibilities pile up, and burnout happens. The one thing I notice every year whenever people devote themselves to write a novel in a month, is one night off will blow your entire wordcount system apart, and that’s when people give up. Don’t give up, just give it a new look. The idea is still good, it just might take more time than you planned. And that’s okay. Hubs tells me all the time, “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.” If a system isn’t working for you, you can change the system so it does.

I hope that if you are making writing goals this year, you’d be willing to share those with me. Feel free to comment below.

If you need a coach to keep you accountable to those goals, check out my coaching services!

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